Tuesday, 10 March 2015

Don't go chasing waterfalls

'Click here to see 25 of the most beautiful places on earth. You'll be AMAZED by #25'.

You won't. Number 25 is a photograph of a waterfall, somewhere in Vietnam... a heavily photoshopped photograph. The scene is undeniably beautiful; a window into the free-spirited paradise no doubt being lived out by some inheritance lucky back-packer. Although the picture doesn't take into account the swarming, unbearably sticky heat in that particular paradise, the putrid stench of the surrounding jungle, the leering toothless perverted tour guide that led you there, the numerous seeping bites all over you that have kept you from a good nights sleep for days. 

Its easy to see the appeal of browsing glossy internet lists of amazing bucket-list destinations - starry eyed basic bitches get a chance to dream of all the things they want to brag about on instagram. #dreamscometrue. Even more basic bitches might even save up their tip-money (by not paying their parents rent for a few months) and get a chance to go to these shangri-la worlds of sedated tigers and posh-voiced hostel bunk-buddies sharing wi-fi codes and stubby cans of heineken.

"Any tips for beach-parties in the Ko Samui dude?"

Truth is, those of us with shit-tinted glasses aren't really that interested in feigning culture on the dusty streets of Thailand. Once all the hype and internet bragging wears off you'll find yourself back in the same mundane job, back at Mum's house with no savings and a dormant STI.

Serial cynics Grimes & Jones are here to tell you not to feel so bad about your lack of ambition, don't let insecurity drag you on an 8 hour journey round the world to 'discover yourself'. Endless hours reading Buzzfeed, watching VICE Documentaries or applying for your Aussie VISA won't make you feel any better - its time to get familiar with your surroundings. You can buy warm, shit beer, pop a few E's, see a miserable tiger and dance on the beach at Blackpool too you know.

Don't go Chasing Waterfalls is an installation piece by short-sighted northern misers Grimes & Jones. Constructed using a large piece of blue builders tarpaulin masking taped to a wall with a post-it note stuck in the middle with the title daubed on. Flowing from the roof to the floor It is a crass, pound-shop alternative to all your waterfall visiting dreams, a tasteless fast-food sustenance to subdue your misleading sense of adventure. It serves as a reminder that sometimes it's better to settle for a comfortable, achievable second-best.

Don't go chasing Waterfalls,
Post-it note, biro and masking tape on tarpaulin

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